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I find most life experiences funny, sometimes ridiculous, and have little fear of death—although I fear the possibility of pain leading up to such. I also occasionally run into emotionally charged situations that are very serious and poignant. So some things are serious to me. But in my world, these are rare. And I sometimes drive people to distraction by being too light hearted. Yet clowns sometimes hide their dark side under the white paint and funny noses on their faces. The following poem, inspired by the muse has become my personal manifesto and describes my deity—who is nameless:
Who am I? I am the manifestation of the FoolThe Aspect of the Joker in the deckThe Clown with the red noseThe standup Comedian I am the guffah, the laugh, and the amused snortI am the giggle that teeters on the edge of sanityAnd the nasty laugh of death’s last victory I am the laugh of self-satisfactionAnd the covering laugh of embarrassment I am the innocent laugh of a childAnd the chittering of inhuman thingsHeard best in the dark I am the shaking of the belly laughAnd the cackle around the cauldron I am the triumphant shriekOf the possessedBehind the bars I can warm the heart of The downtroddenAnd bring hope to the hopeless I inspire the last, derisive laughOf the brave but fallen warrior I am the JesterLord of the jokesA God in My Own right I am the TricksterYet I am not unwiseFor I am the power of fateThat can make fools out of others The old ones call me CoyoteBecause I am cleverBecause I laugh at themWhen I carry off their meat The old ones called me Raven alsoBecause I was smarterAnd flew awayOnly when truly threatened And Ansur is my priestFor I charmed him three times three First in the nightIn the wildernessI awoke himWith my chilling cryWild, free, and echoingThrough the mountains Second at the bus stopOn all foursI scuttled both animal and human-likeWestward into the waiting portal Showing him my graceful strengthWhile grinning at him Thirdly, I met him in a parking lotIn broad daylightNo vision this but physical sightI held my right hand in front of MeGrasping My leftLeft pointing indexPointing in my direction of movementAs I walked around the carsToward himMy oddity directed wayGained his total attentionAnd he saw as I drew close That I gave him a silly grinWhile each eye looked in different directionsAnd he knew thenThat nothing human could seeYet walk true up to him I passed him on his left sideAnd as he turned to lookI made Myself goneFor I live on the edge of ChaosWhere all is possible
I am the FoolWhen I appear you must make a decisionYou must take a new directionYou must act on an opportunityYou must make a move based on faith instead of knowledge Walk with Me and you will experience the world of the MagicianAs I will make that which is spirit manifestFor I carry the toolsThat the magician teaches with I align myself with universal creativityAnd power the magician’s will Beware My sweet, innocent smileFor I fearlessly pursue My needsFear My stanceAnd My lookBecause I am the ArchetypeOf the beginning and end of the journeyAnd nothing can stop Me Yet I care for the human spiritBorn in tender innocenceAnd I give trials and strivingIn security, love, and connectionTo initiate with reason and understandingAnd drive your spirit onwardSo you may die with Knowledge and wisdom Yet I am not too concerned with life or deathSince I simply exist in peaceAnd I am the pure fireOf the beginning of life I am the sunAnd the Son of heavenWho opens the crown chakraTo My lightTo show youThat life on this planeIs folly So laugh along with MeAnd you will be capable Of amazing featsOf heroismAnd charmed death defying acts For I am also holy chanceAnd those who walk with MeLearn wisdom made potentEven in trying and failing Dare to embrace MeAnd I will gift you With hope and fearlessnessAnd aid your steps
Toward pure joy
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